We live like a little ant on this little speck of dust out in space. We get a Ph.D. degree and we strut across the stage and say, “Well, I don’t know whether or not there is a God.” And we can’t even control ourselves. We can’t even keep from blowing ourselves apart. We can’t even keep from manufacturing nuclear
weapons that could destroy the world. We can’t even keep from hating each other, and fighting with each other, and killing each other. We can’t even keep from stealing from each other. We can’t even keep from dying, because all of us are going to die. No wonder the Bible says, “The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God,” because a man that would deny the existence of God is a
fool.  

– Billy Graham

Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Sherwood
Sherwood who?
Sherwood like to be your valentine!

Q: What do squirrels give for Valentine’s Day?
A: Forget-me-nuts.

Q: Did Adam and Eve ever have a date?
A: No, but they had an apple.

Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day?
Sure, they’re very scent-imental!

What did the caveman give his wife on Valentine’s Day?
Ughs and kisses!

What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine’s Day?
Hugs and quiches!

What do farmers give their wives on Valentine’s Day?
Hogs and kisses!

Received from GCFL

About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a school trip. Once we were in the air, and the crew began serving drinks, I could hear them pleading with the children to settle down and let the other passengers get some sleep.

No amount of reasoning seemed to help, until I thought of the solution that actually worked. I picked up the PA mike in the cockpit and announced, “Children, this is the captain speaking. Don’t make me stop this airplane and come back there!”

Received from GCFL

You don’t have a soul.  You are a Soul.  You have a body.
– C. S. Lewis