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The Merry Heart – Difficult-to-Keep New Year’s Resolutions

When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, “LOL!”

Start using Facebook for something other than Farmville and stupid quizzes.

I will try to figure out why I “really” need five Facebook accounts.

I resolve to work with neglected children… my own.

Lose 20 pounds by going to the gym!

I will stop using, “So, what’s your URL?” as a pickup line.

I will spend less than five hours a day on the Internet.

I will read the manual… just as soon as I can find it.

Spend less than $1000 for coffee at Starbucks this year.

Lose weight by inventing an anti-gravity machine.

Stop repeating myself again, and again, and again.

I will stop tagging pictures of myself in pictures even when I’m not in them.

I will think of a password other than “password.”

As seen in GCFL (The Good, Clean Funnies List)